Difference between revisions of "Don't be a contemptible fellow (be excellent to each other)"

Revision as of 09:54, 20 January 2013

This is a combination of Wikimedia's "Don't be a dick" rule, and the guiding principle of Noisebridge (simply to "be excellent to each other").

Wikimedia's version

"Don't be a dick [an abrasive and inconsiderate person]. If people abided by this, we wouldn't need any other policies about behaviour .. and most behavioural rules are special cases of this one. Implicitly or explicitly calling people dicks is a dick-move: don't use this .. as a justification to do so." -- from Wikimedia

The Noisebridge version

"Be excellent to each other is the guiding principle of Noisebridge .. Unlike Wikipedia, Noisebridge takes a positive approach, and avoids the practice of officially enumerating the myriad potential special cases; 'be excellent' is enough. " -- from Noisebridge

Bill and ted be excellent to each other.gif

Discussion

This was first discussed on the private members-only mailing list (see the archives starting from March 15 2012).

Be aware of peoples' sensitivities

Try to be sensitive enough to recognise the pain and suffering of others.

All people have different sensitivities. The experiences we've had in our lives, our environment, traumatic treatment, deprivation, and our genes, all affect how sensitive we are to different things. There is no such thing as ideal-equality in this world, so try to recognise how privileged and empowered you are relative to others.

Something you see as insignificant could be distressing to other people in ways you may not have considered.

Specific issues

In this hackspace racism, sexism, ageism, gender discrimination and elitism are not acceptable. Please recognise the significance of all these different, specific forms of discrimination.

If you feel you've been a victim of thoughtless, insensitive behaviour in the hackspace please let us know in some way, so we can recognise our mistakes. See how to contact the hackspace discretely.

Hot potatoes

When Nottinghack started there was no agreed ethos and no initial discussion of philosophy or politics. People were invited to participate on the basis that 'the space is what you make it', so we all joined with different values and motivations.

As a result, we ended up having lots of confrontations later on, especially regarding these hot potatoes: CCTV, the use of full passport names vs pseudonyms, privacy, anonymity, and ownership of equipment (eg. the laser cutter that is owned by one individual and run commercially). Some people stand forcefully on one side of such debates, depending on their ideology, and they are often viewed as contemptible fellows, being branded as 'authoritarians' or 'anarchists' (or more offensive labels are used).

Be very sensitive around hot potatoes.

Avoid labelling people

It is extremely contemptible to brand someone with a label like 'attention-seeker', 'narcissist', 'ego-maniac', etc. By acting in this way, you can actually inhibit other (quieter) people from speaking out, because you are reinforcing the fear that some shy people feel of being labelled.

If someone desperately needs you to direct your attention towards an issue, and they expresses themselves at all (most are silenced by inhibition), then either find a way to help that person deal with their desperation, or pay attention to the issue they have raised.

Be sensitive even to apparently contemptible fellows

If a person remains in confrontation with others at the hackspace for a long time, then they must be suffering. If that person doesn't give up and go away, but perseveres in confrontation, and endures criticism for a long time, then perhaps they need a really good slap!

To administer a zen slap, first try to understand the significance of what the person is doing, or expressing. Then, if you see that they are misguided, and they are on the wrong path, you will strike when you are able to and when the time is right.

A comic strip illustrating the zen slap. Note: the copyright license for this image is unknown.

Note: People only benefit from having attention directed towards them when they are viewed in the light that wants to be seen. Can you see the light?

Example

A common example of this phenomenon is when hacktivists make life difficult for people who just want to enjoy commercialised geek culture and have fun in the hackspace. Activists often feel the pain of the world in crisis [1], so they sometimes aggressively subvert or disrupt activities that they regard as being irresponsible or detrimental distractions. This is not true of all hacktivists though, because some are motivated more by compassion than by anger, and are able to cause effective disruption effortlessly. They draw on experience and 'cannot be exhausted' [2].

@@ Line 24: / Line 24: @@
 Try to be sensitive enough to recognise the pain and suffering of others.
-All people have different sensitivities.  The experiences we've had in our lives, our environment, traumatic treatment, deprivation, and our genes, all affect how sensitive we are to different things.
+All people have different sensitivities.  The experiences we've had in our lives, our environment, traumatic treatment, deprivation, and our genes, all affect how sensitive we are to different things.  There is no such thing as ideal-equality in this world, so try to recognise how privileged and empowered you are relative to others.
-There is no such thing as equality in this world, so try to recognise how privileged and empowered you are relative to others.
+Something you see as insignificant could be distressing to other people in ways you may not have considered.
-Please bear in mind that something you see as insignificant could be distressing to other people in ways you may not have considered.
 == Specific issues ==
@@ Line 34: / Line 32: @@
 In this hackspace [[racism]], [[sexism]], [[ageism]], [[gender discrimination]] and [[elitism]] are not acceptable.  Please recognise the significance of all these different, specific forms of discrimination.
-If you feel you've been a victim of thoughtless, insensitive behaviour in the hackspace, please let us know in some way, so we can recognise our mistakes.
+If you feel you've been a victim of thoughtless, insensitive behaviour in the hackspace please let us know in some way, so we can recognise our mistakes.  See [[how to contact the hackspace discretely]].
+== Hot potatoes ==
+When Nottinghack started there was no agreed ethos and no initial discussion of philosophy or politics.  People were invited to participate on the basis that 'the space is what you make it', so we all joined with different values and motivations.
+As a result, we ended up having lots of confrontations later on, especially regarding these hot potatoes: CCTV, the use of full passport names vs pseudonyms, privacy, anonymity, and ownership of equipment (eg. the laser cutter that is owned by one individual and run commercially).  Some people stand forcefully on one side of such debates, depending on their ideology, and they are often viewed as contemptible fellows, being branded as 'authoritarians' or 'anarchists' (or more offensive labels are used).
+Be very sensitive around hot potatoes.
+== Avoid labelling people ==
+It is extremely contemptible to brand someone with a label like 'attention-seeker', 'narcissist', 'ego-maniac', etc.  By acting in this way, you can actually inhibit other (quieter) people from speaking out, because you are reinforcing the fear that some shy people feel of being labelled.
+If someone '''''desperately''''' needs you to direct your attention towards an issue, and they expresses themselves at all (most are silenced by inhibition), then either find a way to help that person deal with their desperation, or pay attention to the issue they have raised.
 == Be sensitive even to apparently contemptible fellows ==
-Nobody likes to be widely viewed as a contemptible fellow.  Some of us don't care much :-)  Perhaps that is why some of us appear to draw lots of attention to ourselves, doing things that appear overtly contemptible to others.  It's not because we're seeking attention for ourselves.  Nobody likes to have endless negative energy directed towards them.  Some of us just want to raise awareness of issues that we feel deeply passionate about.  Some of us feel the pain of the world in crisis, are deeply revulsed by the grotesque waste and self indulgence that we see, while at the same time we are in the midst of a mass-extinction event, and billions of people go hungry.
+If a person remains in confrontation with others at the hackspace for a long time, then they must be suffering.  If that person doesn't give up and go away, but perseveres in confrontation, and endures criticism for a long time, then perhaps they need a really good slap!
+To administer a [[zen slap]], first try to understand the significance of what the person is doing, or expressing.  Then, if you see that they are misguided, and they are on the wrong path, you will strike when you are able to and when the time is right.
+[[File:zen-slap.gif|none|frame|A comic strip illustrating the [[zen slap]].  '''Note: the copyright license for this image is unknown.''']]
+{{note|People only benefit from having attention directed towards them when they are viewed in the light that wants to be seen.  Can you see the light?}}
+=== Example ===
+A common example of this phenomenon is when [[hacktivists]] make life difficult for people who just want to enjoy commercialised geek culture and have fun in the hackspace.  Activists often feel the pain of the world in crisis [http://libcom.org/library/chapter-1-%E2%80%93-scream], so they sometimes aggressively subvert or disrupt activities that they regard as being irresponsible or detrimental distractions.  This is not true of all hacktivists though, because some are motivated more by compassion than by anger, and are able to cause effective disruption effortlessly.  They draw on experience and 'cannot be exhausted' [http://acc6.its.brooklyn.cuny.edu/~phalsall/texts/taote-v4.html].
 [[Category:Rules]]